Have you been friend zoned by your crush?

Have you been you been given the “you’re just like a brother to me” speech?

Or worse, have you been made to pause in the middle of your conversation because she needs to answer a phone call by her boyfriend?

Awful. Isn’t it?

Most times, you just feel like standing up and walking out on her, right?

But somehow you manage to stay.

I know that feeling…

Every man has suffered from being labelled as ‘just a friend.’ In fact, I can bet my future that 7 out of every 10 dudes reading this are in a similar situation.

In my previous post, I gave out tips on how to avoid the friend zone after which I got tons of mails from guys who are already waist deep in the dreaded friend zone asking for how to get outta it.

If you’re a guy who always ends up in the friend zone, then here’s the truth: you’re soft, too polite and too sensitive and cannot create the ‘I can’t keep my hands off him’ attraction in a woman.

Getting Out Of The Friend Zone…

Getting out of the friend zone can be somewhat challenging knowing that the friendship is at stake here. But, it can be your biggest mistake if you remain there because you value the friendship more than you value your ego.

You stand the chance of losing the girl you’ve always wanted to date or worst, continue living in doubts as long as you know the girl.

Many men believe that getting out of the friend zone is the best way of reestablishing a new start. Well, it depends, sometimes it’s best to move on to new territories.


    1. Be Truthful & Realize You’ve Been Friend-zoned: the first step to getting out of the zone is to be truthful to yourself. If you’ve tried getting physical with her several times and have met with strict resistance or if she always chips in stories about a particular guy (who isn’t her Dad/brother) when she’s with you, then my friend, you’re there—The Friend zone

    2. Avoid her
    : if you ever want your crush to start seeing something else in you order than a brother then you have to spend less time with her. Avoid spending more than 30 minutes each time you get to be with her. Always have this distracted feel. In short, cut your visits down to twice a week.

    If she calls you as usual just say to her politely in the middle of the talk that you do not have time right now and that you need to go do something.

    This will create a new feeling in her which is a feeling of wonder and confusion. She’ll wonder if you were rude, really busy or not in the mood.

    She’ll wonder why you aren’t there for her as usual. She’ll wonder if she pissed you off or something. And while she wonders, she thinks of you which is the aim of the whole thing.

    A woman will not feel anything for you if you don’t cause some emotional disturbances in her heart. Let her miss you for a while. Like your absence create a void.

    3. Be Bold And Act Like A Man
    : by now you should know that acting all polite and soft around her gets you nowhere close to her pants or heart (as the case may be).
    Instead of sitting back, act with boldness. Call her out of the blues and ask her out on a date. She may find this funny and ask what has come over you or if you’re serious because it isn’t what she knows you for; she hasn’t seen the bold part of you. If you get emotional, you’ll ruin your chances forever.

    Be confident, sound sure (even if your heart is shaky) and tell her you would like to have lunch with her.

    4. Make her jealous: once again, if you don’t cause any emotional turmoil in her mind, she won’t feel a thing for you. Emotions are the engine of a relationship. Love, lust, comfort, joy and jealousy are the perfect ingredient of a happy relationship. Yes, even jealousy!

    Jealousy has a special place in a healthy relationship. Jealousy reaffirms dedication and commitment. It builds new bonds.

    Some ladies will not realize they have feelings for someone until they feel that sting of jealousy when he receives attention from other girls.

    Have you ever noticed that once you start paying less attention to people, and start minding your own business, they start wanting to get close to you?

    “What’s up with him?”

    “Why doesn’t he notice me any longer?” they wonder. They draw closer. They want to unravel your new attitude. The reason is that mystery is fascinating.

    Before we continue, I think it’s important we break down this jealousy thing a bit.

    So, how on earth do I make her jealous?

    Stay with me now and pay close attention to the 2nd point…

    Pay attention to some other girl and make sure she sees you. Make sure you make them laugh out loud too. A must!

    Why would you do this?

    Women like every other female animal on earth are attracted to the male with the most dominance & sex appeal. It triggers a part of their brain that subconsciously tells them that you are sexually productive and an Alpha male. This is sexy.

    Mention other girls you like from time to time in your discussion with your crush. Do you remember how she always talks about other guys when you’re with her? Now is a perfect time to give her a taste of her own medicine. Drop in tales of other chicks you hung out with during the weekend in between your chats.

    For example: if you’re writing a book, you may say “Jenny suggested I put in more examples in the first chapter. I don’t even know where to start, what do you think?”

    From this statement alone, you showed her not only you’ve been talking to Jenny but that you listened well enough to remember what she said. Don’t just make it obvious that you did this on purpose.

    Go out with your friends and tell her how much fun you guys had. It’s simple. Create an image of being a fun guy. Everybody loves a fun person.

    Use the social media. Comment on or share some other girl’s photo on any social network. When you do this, make sure to add a personal message to it. When your crush sees this, it will create a subtly envy in her as you have never shared her picture before.

    She doesn’t know if your interest is diverting from her or if you’re just being friendly to the other girl.

5. Know when to stop and go back to her: too much of everything is wrong. Get too close, soft and friendly and you get friendzoned; get too distant and flirty with other girls and you may lose her.

There should be moderation to everything. If you go about it right, your instincts and her actions will tell you just when to stop and get yourself out of that damned zone to the status of boyfriend or lasher.

Now, go over the main points again and make sure that your efforts in trying to be nice to a girl are paying off. Also, make sure you’re not being too nice or too distant. There should be a moderate alternation between both ends.

NOTE: if after following the above steps and things still do not go as you planned with her, then, it is a clear sign from Cupid that you have to bow out.

I mean, you can’t spend your life tryna get someone to appreciate you. Besides, there are a zillion other women out there dying for attention.

You need to take a decission now on how you want to run your life…

Do you want to keep on being ‘the other guy’ or do you want to take charge of your life?

Now is the right time to act.

For love never dies of starvation but often of indigestion.” Ninon de Lenclos.

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